Fuck the fish in the sea – there are really not that many good ones.
Think about it:
There are many others out there. Now cut them in half unless you’re bisexual, in which case – there are indeed just endless schools of fishes.
Now take out a good 40 percent due to age issues. Drool and senility really affect relationships.
Let the calculators clack. We’re at (100 * 0.5 * 0.4) = 0.2 or 20 percent. The sea seems a lot more … lifeless now.
Ok, now factor in, locality, availability, health, attraction (how the hell? I don”t know), and the ability to meet. There’s actually not a countless number of people out there. However, there is a hopelessly enormous number of limiting factors for each individual. With this formula going, it sees a miracle that humans can procreate at all.
Just as the ability to choose a partner based not only on health and progeny is uniquely human, so is our ability to love someone beyond their “limiting factors.” Now don’t get me wrong – there are obviously factors that each of us cannot over look. However, those factors that we can overlook is what I believe fosters relationships.
So really, there aren’t that many fish in the sea. It’s simply a perspective we want to see when we lose someone we love or don’t even get the opportunity to begin. So unless you are the hit and run relationship type of person, we really only meet a handful of people we really connect with. They are the ones who seem perfect in the beginning who turn out just less than perfect.
Therefore, when people tell me to keep my eyes open and not settle and fall for someone – I think I just ignore them. I really invest myself in what’s happening in the moment. I don’t have time for the broader, world-population encompassing view. Sure, it’s less safe and probably a great way to find yourself alone and hurt. However, what is life if we don’t risk what we have for happiness in the moment?
That’s all we really have, moment after fleeting moment. We can plan all we want for the future – let’s get that job, that house, that perfect image of life – but in the end, we will still experience life in moments. There will never be that time when we can just capture life in some kind of permanent, unchanging existence and live in it ’till the end. Everything is subject to change – and everything will.
I’m a bit sick of this game we play between each other. We only want to act if we feel secure, if we know that there’s only the good result in the end. We look for the signs for the trivial little blinks that hint towards anything good. We are then never fully secure – never fully willing to risk ourselves.
Maybe we’ll fail, but hell, maybe we won’t. And what if we don’t? What then?
Then it’ll seem that there really are plenty of fish in the sea but then we can realize, we really don’t care.
Readership has died recently. The blog stats went from about 80-90 unique views per day to a measly 20 or so. I think people realize that when they search for “emo cartoon” on google, the review for Invader Zim can only go so far alongside the political banter and social whining.
On the other hand, when people ask why I keep this strange little site – I tell them I want to write. The readership count or unique hits shouldn’t matter. I kind of care about who reads this and what not, but I don’t want to continue to care. I need to fall back on the free-for-all writing that drives me.
Therefore, I’m going to take this blog into the private realm and take it off all the search engines and whatnot. I then don’t have to deal with all the weird spam Akismet has been catching.
It’ll be a good thing.
